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The Issue:

Matt is almost 14 months old and healthy. Since we stopped swaddling him at 6 months we have had a horrible time getting him to fall asleep. It often takes up to an hour and half to get him to fall asleep. (Usually at least 45 mins – both at nap times and bed time) He has a set bed and nap time routine. He has 2 daily naps, each lasting between 45 mins and an hour. His bedtime is at 19h00 and he wakes up at 23h00, 01h30 and 03h00 or 04h00 everynight. He starts off in his crib but after the 01h30 wake I bring him to our bed. He is up for the day at 06h00. For naps and bedtime he falls asleep in his crib with me sitting next to him doing crossword puzzles and quite often having to pat his back and "sush…sush…" him. The nighttime wakings I am too exhausted and end up nursing him to sleep. On bad nights he wakes up after every sleep cycle (That is every 30-45 mins) and we usually have 3 bad nights in a row. My little guy was a very happy, easy young baby but since these sleep issues started he has been fussier and clingy. He has never slept through the night, though. But as a young baby all we needed to do was swaddle him, top him up and he’d drift off again. He does not use a pacifier and any attempt to offer an artificial nipple is met with fierce resistance.

Questions:

How do I transition from sitting in the room for him to fall asleep to leaving him awake and drowsy?

Nightweaning? HOW?? He has never accepted artificial nipples and will not accept any milk of any temprature from any container other than me :)

I think our issues would be resolved if we nightweaned. At least the sleeping through the night part. I also downloaded white noise and am hoping that that will help him sleep at night. (I put it on for him and he slept almost 2 hours today for a nap, which is a record. Granted, he did fight his morning nap so hard that he ended up only falling asleep for his nap at 12h30, and will not take an afternoon nap)

Thanks so much for this incredible resource.

Tanja.

Thanks for the feedback! I am trying Nicole's nighweaning suggestions from the ebook. It was a long night last night with a furious little boy. I cut nursings short without lengthening the time between them – that will start tonight.

I will try the lovey suggestion. He has not shown any particular attachement to any item yet so I am not sure where to begin but I will look for something suitable.

The room is relatively darkened as the blinds are drawn shut and there is no direct sunlight on the blinds. But if we continue having issues after nightweaning we will look into getting light-blocking drapes. We might have to anyway in the summer.

Oh, and I tried not patting him, and just raising my voice to a loud sush-sush when he screams louder, and he kindof just gave up and fell asleep. Thanks! I never even thought of NOT patting him when he cries. He is definately transistioning to one nap and this afternoon he fell asleep within 5 mins of being put down without a pat or a sush.

Thanks again for the support.

Update:

Naps are going wonderfully. He has fully transitioned to one nap and things are wonderful. He falls asleep within 5 mins of being put down and sleeps between 2 and 3 hours. As his nap starts around noon it works perfectly. Nicole said she thinks the issues we're having with getting him to fall asleep are schedule related!

Nighttime is another matter. I don't think he is ready to nightwean. As soon as I started moving the feedtimes things got crazy. He now wakes up earlier for each feed, cries and screams until it is time to feed and when I end the feed (As opposed to him ending it) he cries and screams for well over an hour (Last night it was well over 3 hours) He is neither sick nor teething – just stubbourn. I put him to bed after the feed the same way we do when we put him to bed for the night and he cries and cries. We have not slept for 2 nights. As hubby gets up for work at 4h45 we will have to wait a couple of weeks and then try again on a Thursday night. That way hubby only has one exhausted day at work and hopefully by night 4 things are a little better. I am hoping to listen in on the night weaning teleseminar. Maybe that will give us some insight for our next attempt. I will try to find a lovey he'll grow attached to before then. Maybe get 2 of the same item so I don't lose one (Or cut a soft fleecy blanket in half)

Thanks for listening!