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Any advice please,

my gorgeous 8 month old is really struggling with tiredness. Her current Schedule is as follows:

5:30am Wake 5-6 ounces bottle and chats in cot

6:15am Sleep 40 mins

7:00am Wake

7:30 Solid Breakfast

8:20 Sleep 40 mins

9:30 Bottle 6-7 ounces

Sometime betweem 10:30 and 12:30 sleep starts (1 and a half hours) soemtimes only 40 mins)

11:45am Solid Lunch

2:30pm Bottle 6 Ounces

3:00pm Sleep 40 mins  

4:45pm Solid  Tea

6:00pm Bottle 5 ounces

6:30pm Bed

I know this looks great on paper and she had made loads of progress in the last few months…sleeping through, getting to sleep herself etc…but the current problem is that she is constantly tired throughout the day. She rubs her eyes and gets fussy about an hour after each sleep even the long sleep. I have tried giving her more sleeps in the day but she just fights these…to get her to last for each sleep she needs to be carried around…and although she can get herself to sleep it is hit and miss whether we have screaning before she goes to sleep (sometimes for an hour or so). It does'nt seem to make sense in that for example her first and last sleeps this morning when she was put down an hour and a half after she woke (when she started showing tired signs) she stuggled to sleep but the one where i tried to keep her up till after lunch 12:30 today, she went off okay on her own. (but this doesn't always happen this way it so hit and miss)

I was wondering if she is possibly an hour behind ie. she is waking at 5:30 and wants to be up for the day but we are letting her play in her cot for a bit then she sleeps, but really this is too early for her to sleep, that then makes her next sleep oinly 40 mins and it knocks the whole day out???

I was wondering about trying to get her up at 5:30 (When she wakes) for a few days and to keep her up till 7:30ish and see if she then consolidates her first two sleeps into one??? then if this does work we can work on making the 5:30 wake 6:30???

So sorry for all the warble!!! Any Ideas?

Hi cblashes,

I totally empathise x Its a nightmare, specially when you can see that they need the sleep so much.

Thought i would post with an update as it may help.

After posting the above…I decided to try and get my little one up at 5:30 when she first woke…to see if the first sleep she was having was throwing her off kilter…on the first day i got her up when she woke, i kept her for about 2 hours, then put her down for her first sleep, she was so tired i put the dummy in and she went to sleep in my arms before i had chance to read a story or out her in her cot!!!. I put her in her cot and she slept (i think for the 40 mins), i then put her down 2 and a half hours later and she slept for an hour and a half!!!, i then put her down about 2:30 and she slept for 40 mins.

Since then she has slept at least one sleep (an hour and a half) a day and two shorter 40 min sleeps…she has stopped acting continutally tired…no more constant eye rubbing or fussiness dont get me wrong we still have some fussiness  coulnd't eradicate it totally, but i think its teething now not a sleep issue  but she is sooooooo much better. Also the screaming before sleep has got so much better…it does soemtimes happen but i could count on one hand how many times since i have beeen getting her up at 5:30.

She still goes to bed at 6:00 but she sleeps through till 5 – 5:30. She does soemtimes wake for her dummy but usually no more than once in the night, and soemtimes not at all…bliss!. (she did go through a phase of a few months of waking about 3-5 times, either for food or a dummy, so i can empathise with that one too (that was about 6 months old too)

Don't get me wrong its pretty knackering still because were up so early, but i figure that i was getting up to feed her at 5:30 before anyway then my sleep was bad until 7:00 so really theres not much change. I just go to bed early too.

Also our clocks go forward on 28th March so if i don't do anything this will automatically revert to a 6:30 wake up and 7: bed…perfect…fingers crossed!!!

I am not sure what helped the most but certainly if you have have had success with a long sleep at 7:30, it sounds very similar to my situation. My LO got up at 5 this morning  then went for a sleep at half 7 and slept until 9:20, cos she had such a long sleep i waited until after lunch and put her down at 12:30, and shes asleep now 1pm…I'll put her down for her last nap about 2 hours after she gets up. This seem to work for us. If you do try this, Nicole has some info on her site about changing early wakeups…you do it in 15 min increments…so you could try it and then if it works and gets you on a schedule you could work at moving it up an hour…???

Wishing you the best of luck…keep e-mailing if it helps you…its good to know youre not alone sometimes x

Zoe and Bria x

pps have just rememberd that i have also started putting a few dummies in the cot when she goes to sleep so she can find one herself if she wakes…this seems to work soemtimes…you can also get a sleepytot which is a bunny rabbit which holds dummies…looks quite good x

http://www.sleepytot.com/

Hi,

RE: Feed at night – Luckily Bria just stopped waking for it. I had a lot of people telling me i should wean her…she didn't need it etc, maybe she was thirsy…and although she wasn't roaring for food when she woke i knew it was hunger as if i didn't feed her when she woke she would just wake up every hour after until she was feed then she would sleep til morn!. And she would take 7 ounces. Like your son at about 6 – 61/2 months, she began going through the night without waking intermittantly, at one point three nights in a row and i thought ' great cracked it' then she stared waking again! So i reckon it sounds like you are slowly getting to a point where he will start dropping this feed on a more regular basis.

Re: Cot – Personally i wouldn't worry at the mo about him not being in the cot …i assume he is going to sleep with you on the bed without rocking etc. i would say that is the important thing, he is still leanring to go to sleep himself, i still sometimes do the same with Bria, it reminds you why you are a mum!, you can always work towards sleeping in the cot at a later date…although i do remeber how hard this is as if he needs you to help him sleep on the bed you never get  break from each other which is exaughsting.

Re: Timings, Bria does also just do 20-30 min sleep sometimes too. But this is usually when we are out and about i think they get to a stage where its exciting and if they wake up after 25-30 mins (light sleep stage), thats it they are awake!!!

If Bria just does a 20-30 min sleep i usually go 'OMG' under my breath!!! and ride out a crankyish baby until the next sleep time. EG. if she does a 20 min sleep for her lunch sleep ie. 11:15 to 11:35 i won't put her down until her usual 2:30 sleep, but i regognise that she may need more soothing than usual…or i will decide to put her on the bed and lay with her etc…I try not to put her down really early as with bria this makes her timing compltly out and she is cranky for the rest of the day…i have heard that putting them to bed about half hour earlier when this happens can help.

I have heard that at about 11 months you are supposed to not bother about watching for the cues, when i stopped doing this and went by the clock she got much better, maybe our babies are just advanced in this!!! Even now Bria rubs her eyes just before feed time???, she has a feed and then shes fine for a while after.

Re: Worrying, tell me about it!!! i used to spend hours on the net and reading books trying to find out how to get Bria to sleep better, i think my husband also got a bit exasperated with me, but when they are not at home full time they don't realise how knackering looking after a baby who struggles to sleep, and who needs to be held/rocked/slept with is. I remember lots of days where i didn't get a break at all, and was crying myself with exaughstion after she had gone to bed. all you want is your little one on something that resembles a schedule so you can possibly anticipate 5 mins in the day where you can get a shower! 

Re:Crying it out…you have to do what feels right to you…so don't read this if you don't want to…but my story was that i was really really really anti cry it out…i am a SW so for me my baby crying and me not attending is kin to abuse…but…it got to a stage where Bria was so overtired and unable to settle that she wouldn't be rocked, held to sleep and even if i put her on the bed she would just scream (she too is very very loud and just wouldn't give in – i reckoned it would never work for her at all). It got to a point where one day she screamed until she stopped breathing…luckily i was there to pick her up and she just flopped on my shoulder…scariest thing ever…it was at that point that i got the message that she needed to learn to do it herself. We decided to put her to bed a few nights later and did the check and console every 5 mins, increasing by 2 mins at a time…it took 40 mins of hell, i was crying my husband was practically holding me down!, i'm not saying that is was solved that night but it def. was miles better after that and its got steadily bettter and better. She now crys a lot less than she ever did. If she crys before sleep now i know its only because i have left it too long to put her down…my fault! But really don't do this unless you can see it through…and don't so it if you don't agree with it.

RE: routine, your routine sound really like mine, maybe try going by the clock for a few days and see? you can always go back to how you did it before if it doesn't work.

Bria is up at 5:30

sleep 7:40

sleep 11:15

sleep 2:30

bed 6 – 6:30

Its all trial and error with our little ones !

So glad your LO is finding the dummy wish they had homing beacons on them

So sorry for warbling on….i can't half natter!!!

Good luck x

P.s. it will happen, although it doesn't feel like it now he will start to take longer naps and you will get some time for yourself x